Sunday, August 9, 2009

To say or not to say, that is the Question?

(not a self portrait)

After weeks of hearing some great and some not so great comments on my body, I thought I would write a nice little post to inform the world on appropriate and not appropriate things to say to a pregnant woman.

Things to say: When a woman is pregnant her self esteem is not at it's highest point. A pregnant lady is impatient to get her beautiful, but not fully "cooked" baby out of her body so she can breathe, eat, and generally feel like a person again. This is a time to only say kind and uplifting things.

1. You look great!
2. Wow, you are so tiny!
3. I wish I looked like you when I was pregnant!
4. You are almost done.
5. Wow, I would have never thought you were that far along!

Things not to say: this is a great guide in whether or not to voice your precious opinion.... Imagine said pregnant lady is simply overweight and not pregnant...would you still make your very perceptive comment? If not, DON'T SAY IT! She already knows what you are likely going to comment on. If you must make a comment...say it in your head and move on. If you just can't help yourself, change the comment. If she is bigger than a planet, you could simply say..."You look fantastic!"

1. You are starting to waddle!
2. How far along are you? Oh, you still have a LONG time to go.
3. You keep getting bigger and bigger, each time I see you.
4. Lookin' BIG!
5. Have you been eating a lot of donuts?
6. How much weight have you gained?
7. You have got to be having twins!

Maybe, just maybe, we could leave all comments about the pregnant woman in our heads. Simply treat this woman like the person she is, and forget her personal appearance for now, and give her something else to talk about. You could ask her about a book she's read, if you could do her laundry, how she gets her bathrooms so sparkling, etc.....


D.C. Butler's said...

AMEN SISTA! I can't see you but I have no doubt that you are as lovely as ever. Hey, how about hooking us all up with that yummy looking jam recipe!

The McGill Crew said...

I'm just jealous that you've looked beautiful throughout your pregnancy! Like when I saw you at the store looking great....and it wasn't the A/C! You're beautiful inside and out!!!!!!!! :)

Z Family said...

Well, you have been incredibly productive, active and from what i can see... just perfect on the outside with a lil one growing!! While I have not met you face to face, I just love your creativity, loving family and motherly ways. I’d say you are doing pretty good. Can’t wait to see your lil one.

Bisel Family said...

I really wasn't trying to squeeze compliments out of people...but thanks everyone!

Ponczoch Family said...

Why can't people just realize that short people don't have as much room to hide their baby? People always thought I was carrying twins when really it was just little Jinnie inside. The joys. Oh, and then there is Hailey who always tells me I look prego when I'm not. Wow, thanks for letting me vent!

BTW, can I do your laundry?

Sarah said...

Good advice! I hope you haven't heard all of the "not to say's." Good luck with your pregnancy, You're getting so close!! And although I haven't see you in years, I'm sure you look awesome! (I've never seen you otherwise!).

The Driggs said...

You really do look gorgeous, and I'm not just saying that due to this post, but you already know I feel that way about ya! I would offer to do your laundry, but I need to first finish mine, which basically means I will NEVER do your laundry! I read 2 1/2 books in Hawaii (almost done with that last 1/2 which will total them to 3), and they are GREAT reads...will lend them to you...but when I'm done with this will need some recommendations from you. I am on a reading frenzy! Hope you're feeling well.