1)Nervousness....I had hoped that when I was grown up I would finally not only "know" that being nervous doesn't serve me, but I would actually overcome this affliction. However, after today's showing [playing my violin in Sacrament meeting], nervousness has progressed, and I am fully aware that I am a 5 year old. Seriously, shouldn't I be able to stand up in front of my friends, and play a piece without shaking all over the place. Totally lame.
2)Comparing ... again, something I "know" I should be different about. I "know" I shouldn't compare myself to others, but I am still not quite mature enough to put that into action. I see my fabulous friends and family accomplishing goals, being great parents, having great hair [you know, only the important stuff], and all that jazz...and I am still a sucker for feeling like I am a failure somehow.... I then talk myself out of my antics, and realize again maturity is so elusive.
3) Worrying...I know worrying about something doesn't make it better, it doesn't solve anything, and it just causes stress. So, armed with that fabulous knowledge, wouldn't I be amazing and not worry about family, friends, my children, how my children will turn out, if the world is going to implode/explode, if the world is too wicked, when I might lose my parents, managing our money, and if I my big zit will ever go away?
The list is getting long, but you might be getting my point. I hoped, that as I started this wrinkling process that maturity would just come along with it. Now, it looks like I am actually going to have to do some serious work to put the "Mature" title in my back pocket. Or, maybe the solution is to only to do things I feel comfortable with, only be friends with average people (and of course, disown the family that outdoes me), and put on those rose colored glasses everyone keeps talking about. I'll look at Target tomorrow.